Victory '08 brings with it victory for H8
...not a headline I expected to write on the eve after the election of President-elect Barack Obama; a man I threw my support behind a year ago and for whom I have volunteered time to ensure this win. The last several weeks however (or was it only 2?) I switched gears after realizing that I was following the crowd to do things for him campaign and forgetting my issues at home. I started working with a local Dems office to defeat propositions 4 and 8. Closest to my heart was killing 8. Last night we were able to hear the election called for our man and even hear him speak before numbers emerged on our state's issues.
I was at a club with volunteers I'd worked with on and off for a year to support Obama... they hadn't seen much of me recently though because all my work had shifted to defeating props 8 and 4. I visited about 300 doors from Northeast L.A. to the heart of East L.A. I made phone calls. I hung door signs. I walked in the heat and in the rain. I spoke for over 30 minutes to an 84-year old retired pastor who wasn't even on my list but had a Yes on 8 sign in his yard. I didn't win him over but I got him to consider my points. I saw him absorb and accept the notion of "pro-choice" vs the only term he'd ever adopted, "against pro-life". He invited me back and I intend to go back and see him again soon. I believe he may come around to see that there is no reconciling what God demands and bigotry; that discipleship cannot follow exclusion. I spoke with others in my fractured Spanish and got a friend to walk with me on one day, a gay man weary of revealing himself too openly in public... I changed the mind of a young voter at work who didn't just agree with me 'cause I out-talked him but wanted to understand and, after our time together, understood.
When the election was called for Obama we screamed. I screamed a lot. We hugged each other. I bounced. We cried. We laughed. I shared my contraband wine with someone in the crowd.
Outside all the passing cars were honking. A bus drove by and most of the passengers were gathered at the front of the bus; the bus driver blared his horn as he passed. A group of people skipped by banging on pots and pans from their kitchen. A family made up of what appeared to be a mother and 5 kids appeared at a hall-window in the old apartment building across the street and all of us gathered on the sidewalk waved hello to them and they waved back.
Back inside, we watched McCain's concession. Then Obama's speech. In a darkened club we all stood, facing the same direction, and listened to our President-elect address us for the first time and we roared. The girls get a puppy, we cheered.
young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight - we flipped our Sh*t. We cried some more. We applauded and pumped our fists in the air. It was a good night full of all the excitement befitting the occasion.
Following the speech the djs began their set, "Sweet Home Alabama" -erhm, sorry, couldn't resist. I don't remember what song it was - Stevie Wonder, I think. We hugged again. We danced, laughter bursting from our lips.
CNN still streamed as the music pumped through the crowd and a handful of us were still keeping an eye on the screen.
And then the first numbers for Prop 8 came out. We stopped.
Immediately.
Completely.
After a while we looked at each other and reassured each other that it was still early - too early. Only 22% of the precincts reporting at that time; surely trailing early was due to lots of small-community CA was coming in first. Obama had won; we still had our own local-issues votes to count. Don't Worry; Be Happy.
When Emily and I left that night a gay couple in line, seeing our No on Prop 8 buttons, cheerily informed us that San Francisco, L.A., Marin - those votes hadn't even been counted yet; surely everything would be straightened out when our larger counties were counted. We enthusiastically agreed. I said we'd all worked too hard for this a thing like this - a constitutional amendment for the first time in California that discriminates against a minority. No way. Not here. Not like this.
I woke this morning at 4am unable to sleep from worry about 8 passing. I broke down at 6am and checked CNN. 92% of precincts reporting and Prop 8 leading. Emily and I talked a bit. Tried the reassurance thing again (there were still 2 mil votes to count, after all). We talked a bit about strategy: what did the No on 8 group do wrong; what might have synched it? Did the increase of black voters really do us in as had been feared? Really; in
this election?!
I tried to think, humbly, that there was simply still work to do. ...and then my mind, while I tried to shut out the worry, started to float The Beach Boys from still waters deep in the recesses. One song has been linked in me to the struggle for equal rights for same-sex couples for about 15 years now, Wouldn't It Be Nice: a song about the eager yearning to love each other freely, for the right to marry and to finally be in "the kind of world where we belong". I tried to shut this song out, too, but my stomach tightened from the work and I felt sick. So I let it play in my head, a bit at a time. And I shared it with Emily and uttered a line here, a line there. Each line feels poignant, all on its own. And then I finally cried.
I can't tell you exactly why I cried then; why I've cried off and on throughout the day. I am resoundingly heterosexual and have no gay family members that I'm aware of... I have, and have always had, a fair number of gay friends (it just somehow works out that way). Some are in long-standing relationships and there has generally been a great variety in age -- but none of the issues directly facing the gay community are my issues at this time. I don't deal with them from day to day. My work does not involve this struggle. And yet, I have been filled with a passion for LGBT rights since I was a child in elementary school and didn't even understand what I was feeling (which is entirely another story). I have not done much aside from empathize before but the struggle hooked me early on.
President-elect Obama (I just like typing that out) said this last night:
... the true strength of our nation comes not from our the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity, and unyielding hope. Though democracy can't be said to have played out for a minority group in California yesterday, I have unyielding hope that liberty and opportunity can be won for this group so that all of us are safe, respected and empowered.
This great loss - and others like it across the country - juxtaposed against this momentous win is merely the resounding call to take nothing for granted and to keep all hands on deck; there's a lot more work to do beginning now and it won't be someone else who does it. On this issue, this issue of discrimination, of exclusion, of intolerance: it never lasts and hate never wins - inclusion is inevitable and love conquers all. I have to believe that. On the other issues we are facing and new issues we will face in the next 8 years, it will be by our efforts in our daily lives that will reinforce our efforts leading up to the polls and, in this way, we can all live in "the kind of world where we (*all) belong".
Celebrate this win but take the responsibility we all have now seriously. Stay informed, stay involved, never back down and help those who haven't come around yet to cross over. Don't buy the fear and don't trade in hate - we must be better.
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